Questions.

I dont' understand it. How does life work? How can you understand the mind of the opposite sex? How do you find friends, a significant other? Who helps you determine whether a man likes you, or does not? Can you tell by their look, or must they tell you? What's the point of living a life that is already set...? Why can't we know what is about to become of us? Why do we worry about the thing we trust in most? Why do we love? Is love such an overrated thing that I've been wanting all my life? Because I found it, is it going to leave me... because I wanted it all my life? How do you know? Does God really talk to you over the space of your dreams? Does he talk to you just randomly while you're in school? What's the point in knowing? Will he talk to you once you die, even if you go to hell?

Why are all these questions shooting out of me? Why do I wonder? Why do I worry about Love? Every little thing that happens I get scared I'll lose the one thing I want. Every little thing, whether it be something I did or something he did. why is this? Do I just not want to lose the one I feel is the one? Do I just not want to lose that one person who accepts me?

Ahh...he is getting annoyed with my way of viewing things isn't he? I find that to be hurtful. He accepts me for who I am, but once I get scared, I worry (yes it so happens to be about a similar thing) he automatically tells me not to do things how I will. When he believes "Do as you will" or what not. Do how you would do it. I love for that, but I don't know if he's getting annoyed with me. What if he is? That would be a heartbreaking thing.

I hope he's not getting annoyed with me. I worry because of the things said, because he tells me to worry. Because he is scared of people who have faith in him, trust him. I trust him more than anyone else...and that's scary. I accept his way of living, and I know that he will not always be there. I can't always have him..I'm just scared. Scared i'll lose him completely, scared he will be annoyed with me and leave.

I feel like throwing up.